FEELING a difference...

Scroll down a ways, or click to the previous post from yesterday and you will see that I posted a picture of myself. The caption reads "80 lbs GONE FOREVER!". I did a progress shot a while ago (before Christmas). I made it a comparison photo, on the left is me right after I had my son (my heaviest weight ever) and on the right is me, 80 lbs lighter. Yes, I was at the SAME POINT I AM NOW, just a few months ago. So what happened? The holidays are what happened. I lost my focus, I lost my drive and I just stopped caring so much. I inevitably gained almost 10 pounds in the course of about 3 weeks. Yes, that IS some serious eating.

So why did I post THIS picture?

Its actually very simple to explain. Although I'm STILL at 80 lbs lost, I feel a huge difference. I've never actually felt thinner before.....not until now. For the first time, in a long time, I look in the mirror and I am proud of what I see. I want to explain the extent of my "proud" emotion. I'm not proud because I think I look "hot". I'm not proud because I think I look like my favorite model/actress (lord knows, I could never be as beautiful as the lovely Julia Roberts *wink wink*) I'm not "proud" because of the size pants I wear. When I look in the mirror, I think only of all the hard work I had to do to get here. All the times I wanted to eat that piece of pizza, but I didn't. All those times I really just wanted to stay home, not go to the gym and just watch TV, but I got up anyway and trudged out there and made myself sweat. All those times that the haters laughed at my videos and made fun of me behind my back, but I kept going and kept doing my thing because I knew it was working. THROUGH ALL OF THIS, has come my reward, my pay off, my happiness.

There's nothing better than knowing that YOU accomplished something. Knowing that YOU are the real reason why you have succeeded. I do take so much pride in where I am with my weight loss. Now, do I have over 30 more pounds to go? Yes. But here's the wonderful thing about getting this far: I think about those next 30+ pounds and I think, 'well, I've come this far, it would be a shame and such a waste of my hard work and efforts thus far to just stop now'. In other words, after everything I have been through so far, I'll be damned if I don't GET TO GOAL. I WILL get there. I CAN get there. There is no 'CAN'T' in this girl's vocabulary.

So, I would like to take a moment to thank those that have supported me. All the encouraging comments (no matter how small or insignificant you might have thought they were) were the things that kept me going. All the love and support I have received from friends, family and perfect strangers via the YT WLC has been overwhelming, and I can honestly say that I don't know if I would have gotten this far with out it. To reiterate what I wrote underneath that picture I posted yesterday: THANK YOU for inspiring me, THANK YOU for encouraging me, THANK YOU for telling me, 'You can do it!' when I felt like nothing more than a failure, THANK YOU for all the friendly advice, THANK YOU to my friends in my personal life who have had my back and told me to keep my head held high when these haters started to attack, THANK YOU to everyone who cares, THANK YOU to everyone who reads this blog, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. From the bottom of this girl's heart.

There are more "body improvements" to come. But its important to take a step back once in a while and marvel in a job well done....even if that 'job' is still in progress. ;)