Thursday, June 2, 2011

Looking for a "Leader".....

I cannot tell you how many times I get personal messages both on Facebook and on Youtube and even to my personal email from people I know in my own personal life, and they're asking me about what I did to lose the weight and what I think they should do to lose the weight they feel they need to lose. I get very uncomfortable in these situations. I have to admit that there has been many times that I simply don't answer these messages or emails. I want to help others and encourage others and I'm all about giving helpful ideas or opinions about weight loss, but I'm not about to sit here and tell you, "Okay do this and that and this and that and YOU WILL LOSE WEIGHT." Why am I not willing to do this? Do I have some amazing weight loss secret that I'm just not willing to share with others? No. Its simply because, I'm NOT a medical professional, I have NO formal education or training on food, dieting, exercise or weight loss related issues, therefore I'm not comfortable spatting off about what others should do, when the fact of the matter is: I'm still figuring it out for myself!

Here's the root of the problem (in my most humble opinion): People often look towards others to be their "Leader", their "Personal Savior" if you will. I have always been puzzled by this. I've never understood why people feel they need to be told what to do and when to do it. Maybe its because I've always been very independent in nature and kind of a "natural leader" that I've never understood what makes people want to "follow" others. I can only come to a conclusion that some people simply cannot think for themselves or push themselves to do certain things and it just so happens that losing weight is one of the most difficult things a person can do the math.

But here's the point I'm trying to make in this blog tonight: If you don't put up, shut-up, and do the work....If you don't stop the bullshit and stop your excuses....If you don't get up off the couch and force YOURSELF to do the work....then I personally believe that you will never get to where you want to be. Look at all the greatest success stories in our world today. These are people who knew what they wanted and would stop at nothing to get it, or achieve that level of greatness. Do you think they sat there and just wished for things to happen? No. They got up off their ass and they made things happen! This type of thinking is the ONLY reason I have had the success I have had with weight loss thus far.

The phrases I hate to hear the most are, "I can't..." and "Its so hard..." or "I just wish..." Why do I hate these phrases? Because I feel like they don't do any good at all. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I've never uttered these phrases before in my life, because I HAVE! Of course I've said these things and even believed them! But there came a point where I was saying so many "I cant's" and "I wish"s that it got old and it really started to piss me off....yes, I got pissed off with myself! I remember the day that I literally sat down and said to myself, "Dammit Julie. Its time to cut the shit! Stop making all these excuses for your poor choices and bad behavior and start doing some damn good in your life."

I am of the opinion that there is no one to blame in your life for your weight problems other than yourself. YOU decide to eat what you're eating. YOU decide to sit there on the couch and not go for a walk. YOU make poor decisions day in and day who's to blame but yourself? BUT!!!!! Here is the key: Instead of hating yourself forever for making these poor decisions and getting yourself to the overweight point that you're currently at....instead, decide to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Don't become a victim of your own poor choices. Every time you screw up, LEARN FROM IT! You can either dwell on your screw-ups and remain stagnant, OR you can acknowledge them, correct them, do your damn best not to repeat them, and move on. And that's the only way you're going to really get to where you want to be.

Consider this:
"The day you take complete responsibility for yourself, the day you stop making any excuses, that's the day you start to the top...."

1 comment:

  1. "put up, shut up" -- hm, where did I just hear that before?? Oh YEAH, in my last video!!! hahaha! Should I re-name you "Sophie"? lol! (I really don't mind, actually it's flattering!).

    To the topic at hand -- the guidance-less. It is amazing to me too how many people seem to be searching for the "latest" gimmick/trend/grand-standing jackass to "follow". It's hard, but we all have to do this on our own, in the end.

    The single tree I always show in my videos lately? Maybe to some that represents God or some other spiritual thing. But for me, what it truly represents is me. I'm on my own on this, ultimately. It's my body, my decisions, my "journey". We start out life alone, we leave life alone. And I think when I'm done with the fat-loss and I'm completely transformed, I'll become that tree, out in nature, enjoying my life to its fullest, soaking in the sun and enjoying the breeze on the mountainside.

    That's not to say I don't need the "Fellowship of the Flab" that we all have here on YT. I certainly do, and beyond that I need support from my wife and friends and family. The more the better. But when it comes to me and what I need to do, it is always my decision. I may adopt ideas I see, but only if I feel they will help me meet my goals on my terms. I never follow anyone blindly and in general I think I do things in a pretty unique and maybe even weird way sometimes. That works for me.

    Each day, we all face decision points. Do I return to the world of excuses that brought me to obesity, or do I choose the better path? Just 2 days ago, I was faced with this choice. Do I go mountain biking today, or do I put it off for "another" day. I literally stood there, going to the right, stopping, going to the left, stopping...and finally, I said "f-this, I want to lose the fat!" and I got the bike. Yes it was blazing hot that day, but damn it, I did the biking. Who knows if I would have done it the next day or the day after that.

    We all face these moments, every day, maybe every hour. How we resolve these decisions makes the difference between winning and losing, not just in weight loss but also in life. Small things become bigger things, good habits grow into good workers and good careers, healthy habits turn into smaller waistlines and happier/healthier people.

    Sir-Blogs-a-Lot/internet addict